chee bye how now...i still can not sleep....she sleep le ma....feel like calling her...but i now don know her number...pain pain really very pain...how...i don know why i still love her until now...chee bye wat can i do...i don wan have this feeling...my friend they all oso wan help me...but really can not...i wan to thanks max tat wan helping me...but this thing is can not help de...i really wan to stand up....but i can not...i know why people say once u fall down u can't get up so easy....this time i really fall into a very big hole...fucking big hole..noboby can help me is i must climb up the hole by myself.....this thing is follow me now and i wan kepp run away but i can not...i wan to climb up...i use all my strange...who know it...don know...it really pain...when can i get out of ther hole...i don wan to stay inside anymore...i now trying...but i really sometime wan to give it up for it...i wan to give up le i don wan to be strong le...i really tired about tat le...i really can not come out from tat...HWEE TING....how u teach me la...and tell me wat should i do...it pain full....ur birthday is coming...happy birthday ar....i wan to tell u ba i can not say out....why i do this ting to u...i wan u to come back...i don wan anything...really...i give up on it le...u let me know alot of thing...u let me be good to bad..know how to think....last time i do anything i will never think then go do....Now...i will think i do anything i wiill think of u...i look like childish but i am not...in this place i can suffer laster pain...play and play...got wat thing i oso play....but is i wan de ma...no i don wan de...is trying to not thinking of u....i suffer never mind...but u better don suffer..i promise u before i will protect u now i oso will do it...if u do anything i will sure help u...and protect u....like i at police station tat time...i will side u...actually the police ask me izzit i do the tat thing izzit u and me do but i die oso don say...the officer say if i don say he will ask u up...because the whole school oso know u are my stead....don know which fucker say de...i think is the fucker teacher say de ba....sorry ar...but now i still can protect u...because i still at ur back looking at u...sorry ar...u happen anything in school or wat i will now de...like tat time who stole ur hp i oso know ...i go find that person...if he /she wan touch u i will find them back...u know me if u happen anything i will help u...use up all my strange i will sure help u de...i wont look u like tat...this is all my feeling from my heart...never mind i suffer...i will try...not try is i will take it...i don wan go fan u...i know if i go find u...u will get more fan....i know wat can i do le...is looking at ur back...i know u and ur stead now is very happy...max,fuxiang,ken say wan go find tat guy...but i say don wan le let her go...she happy i oso happy....maybe time is really up...i should let go...but i can not....really..i try before le......u happy a not now..??u tell me wat should i do....if can i oso don wan to know u...i don know now so hurt...but i never regret...if don have this thing to happen i wont grow up...and i wont know how to think....i know u hate me now...but i wont blame u..because i know i hurt u de is more pain then me...but u can overcome is good.....but can not do it...i don wan...i not like last time...i still wait for ur one call and a msg...never mind tat call or msg is scolding me or not....it ok to me...i really lost my way... i don kknow which way i should go...when tat time i leave u....i until now oso don know which way i need to go..now my life is one day go by one day like tat....i don know...this big stone when i can put down...i really very tired u know....u know tat......feel like one sleep don wan to wake up....but can not i know life oso must go...Chew Zi hang u will stand up one day...don give up...already 1 year le can not try until half way.....
Saturday, October 20, 2007
chee bye how now...i still can not sleep....she sleep le ma....feel like calling her...but i now don know her number...pain pain really very pain...how...i don know why i still love her until now...chee bye wat can i do...i don wan have this feeling...my friend they all oso wan help me...but really can not...i wan to thanks max tat wan helping me...but this thing is can not help de...i really wan to stand up....but i can not...i know why people say once u fall down u can't get up so easy....this time i really fall into a very big hole...fucking big hole..noboby can help me is i must climb up the hole by myself.....this thing is follow me now and i wan kepp run away but i can not...i wan to climb up...i use all my strange...who know it...don know...it really pain...when can i get out of ther hole...i don wan to stay inside anymore...i now trying...but i really sometime wan to give it up for it...i wan to give up le i don wan to be strong le...i really tired about tat le...i really can not come out from tat...HWEE TING....how u teach me la...and tell me wat should i do...it pain full....ur birthday is coming...happy birthday ar....i wan to tell u ba i can not say out....why i do this ting to u...i wan u to come back...i don wan anything...really...i give up on it le...u let me know alot of thing...u let me be good to bad..know how to think....last time i do anything i will never think then go do....Now...i will think i do anything i wiill think of u...i look like childish but i am not...in this place i can suffer laster pain...play and play...got wat thing i oso play....but is i wan de ma...no i don wan de...is trying to not thinking of u....i suffer never mind...but u better don suffer..i promise u before i will protect u now i oso will do it...if u do anything i will sure help u...and protect u....like i at police station tat time...i will side u...actually the police ask me izzit i do the tat thing izzit u and me do but i die oso don say...the officer say if i don say he will ask u up...because the whole school oso know u are my stead....don know which fucker say de...i think is the fucker teacher say de ba....i don wan hai u to come up so i say the truth but u oso went up...sorry ar...but now i still can protect u...because i still at ur back looking at u...sorry ar...u happen anything in school or wat i will now de...like tat time who stole ur hp i oso know ...i go find that person...if he /she wan touch u i will find them back...u know me if u happen anything i will help u...use up all my strange i will sure help u de...i wont look u like tat...this is all my feeling from my heart...never mind i suffer...i will try...not try is i will take it...i don wan go fan u...i know if i go find u...u will get more fan....i know wat can i do le...is looking at ur back...i know u and ur stead now is very happy...max,fuxiang,ken say wan go find tat guy...but i say don wan le let her go...she happy i oso happy....maybe time is really up...i should let go...but i can not....really..i try before le......u happy a not now..??u tell me wat should i do....if can i oso don wan to know u...i don know now so hurt...but i never regret...if don have this thing to happen i wont grow up...and i wont know how to think....i know u hate me now...but i wont blame u..because i know i hurt u de is more pain then me...but u can overcome is good.....but can not do it...i don wan...i not like last time...i still wait for ur one call and a msg...never mind tat call or msg is scolding me or not....it ok to me...i really lost my way... i don kknow which way i should go...when tat time i leave u....i until now oso don know which way i need to go..now my life is one day go by one day like tat....i don know...this big stone when i can put down...i really very tired u know....u know tat......feel like one sleep don wan to wake up....but can not i know life oso must go...Chew Zi hang u will stand up one day...don give up...already 1 year le can not try until half way.....
Friday, October 19, 2007
i wan to ask hwee ting"why u so fast find a stead le....how about me u forget me le ar.....chee bye i wan to hate u or still love u?????i really don know...i know u can not forgive me wat i do...but why???i really wan to know...wat i can do to change back u....i already tired le....i just wan a call or msg....just one time only....u know how pain is i now....i go everywhere i oso can think of u....ya i admit tat i treat u like tat....is i wan de meh...i don wan...u know one thing i now oso can because of u i today at mrt cry le....why???tell me why can.???i hate myself why i wan to do tat to u....u know why the resone tat i leave u...i really love u until i don know how to protect u....they are find me but i have only one way to protect u is to leave u....i don know...i regret tat i do all this and now i have a lesson....really hurt me....i now oso change le...i don wan to find problem if i find problem i will think of u....so i don wan i have a big big lesson le...really hurt me until....i feel like killing myself...why i don know how to think....sorry...i know tat say sorry is nothing i really...can not take it aany more le...why my life is like tat...i don wan i just wan to be together with u...i don one everything...why u don scold me u telll me...u scold me i will feel better....why god is like tat not fair to me...i already change le....i stiill alone...i only can find u in the pain...in the dream.....why...i don wan...i wan u to stay with me pls...i know i say all this is too late le...but wat can i do....u tell me to change back u....i saw u i oso can not say don leave me because i know u have a good stead le....i wish tat all ur pain in ur life...i will help me to suffer tat..then u can be happy forever....this is only i can do....i really wish tat u will be happy forever....i don wan u to be not happy...u don be so childish le must grow up.....u can not wreak ur stead like with me and don scold ur stead....and do any thing must think then do...i know ur type u do any thing u wont think...do le then say don be like tat le...i not be urside to help u to clear up all this....remember must grow up....i will use my life to exchange ur happy oso can...pls don do anything stupid....u don remember me never mind...but u can stay with me in my heart can le...u oso must treat ur stead good don treat him like never mind....he will any how think de...i can tan han u...but ur stead maybe can not...must think of ur stead watever u do...."I CAN TAKE DOWN ALL UR PAIN...I OSO CAN EXCHAGE UR SAD...EVERYTHING OSO BUT I ONLY WAN U TO BE HAPPY....i know suffer but i belivf on god i exchange tat i wont regret....i already lose everything le...i going to move house le...and i going be sad forever and have alot of pain from tat day i swear to god exchange all the pain from u...and i swear that u have no pain forever i wiill help u to suffer...i will take down all the pain...it painful but i take it...now my life left pain and sad day...from tat day i swear to god...i have exchange ttat le...so u must happy...u can hate me forever i wont say anything...sometime i feel like killing myself the pain make me very sad...and cry...i will try to be strong i promise myself i will be strong...i doing is to help u oso...i can not die if i die i ccan not help u le...painfull life i going...
hey...nothing to do then write this...haxi sian day by day....ya Hwee ting birthday is coming....haha i still remember her birthday...like 31 DEC....wat i should do ar...really don know..go find her...i don dare because i don dare to face her...how is she now...thinking of her now...haxi...she know i still at his back...to watch her and protect her.. really i swear if his stead treat her not good i will sure go find him....i think they are more pei then me and her....his stead can treat her well as me...Me can hurt her and give her worry...never mind la i can take down the pain...because of her...i take down the pain already 1 year le la...so i can...i very time at night cant sleep is because of her....close my eyes i will saw her....it all my fault...sorry...some one like me but i reject....because i don wan to forget her...she is my WaWa(bao bei)...noboby can take her place and noboby can replace her and i don wan oso...actually in life i am happy and like to play around like a kid but my heart is really pain until....from tat day i leave her...haha....
Thursday, October 18, 2007
Hey...it me...haha...sian at home alone...nothing to do....wat is gal thinking..i wan to know lei....they change stead like chang T-shirt like tat....i really wan to know...why i so stupid last time...don wan to talk about this le la...anyone belivf in fate...i belivf because i got go through this before....i saw my love one when i don know will saw her de...so tired sai...today work until very hard...but it is good tat i tired...because i can try not to think about her......
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
How i overcome my feeling for her.....i really don know....no one can know me feeling....miss her really i don wan to bluff myself le....sian...i wan to find her back but i don dare because i have no face to see her....wait la...i belivf tat i will overcome this de...and go back to see her.....sorry....
HWEE TING!!!!!!!
MISS U ALOT!!!!
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
Today i off...i go east coast swimming....hahaha...so fun..i with my "bro" they all...but got one thing....i think her again..sian sai....when i play game tat time i think of her....haha...but now it ok le not so pain le...nt like last time...haha...don talk about this le.....
THIS MY POTOH
Monday, October 15, 2007
i still alone sai....how i really don know....who know my feeling no one know...i now trying to give up le....i oso wan to go army le....sian....how is she now....where is she now....doing wat now....i really wan to know who can tell me....maybe it really time up for me le ba....give up ba....don wait le....but i really not sure i give up on her le ma....i really wan to know how is she i really wan to know who can tell me.....pls tell can....sorry...
Tuesday, October 09, 2007
